You Know You're About to Have a Baby When

Your four year old tells you "your belly's getting so big mom, she's coming any minute" and your two year old is asking you if they are going to "cut your baby out" at every tedious doctors appointment.  

When all of your bills are paid, and the ones at the beginning of December are already taken care of as well. 
When your squeezing every single appointment possible in so that we can lay as low as we can after she arrives. From oil changes to hair and dentist appointments to photography newborn consultations. 

When you start to panic because you realize you hardly have anything, let alone a room organized and ready.  


When you have people asking you left and right what kind of food allergies your family has in hopes to send over a nice meal after she's here. 

When your husband asks you why your breathing so hard -every single day- and you lay down in bed at night curious as to why the hell your heartburn can't at least come during the day. 

When your up at 4am anxiously putting baby items in your cart on your cell phone because you can't sleep and apparently 4am is a productive time. 

When you start planning where the big sisters are going to go and prepping them for mamas hospital stay. 

When you stare at your kids in awe and a lump somehow makes it's way to the tip top of your throat and you wonder how they will react with a new baby sister and instantly panic and you start biting your nails and fidgeting. 

When your maternity jeans nearly have wholes in the knees and you refuse to buy any other piece of clothing that won't fit after pregnancy because your just too close-so you settle for leggings instead. 

When you barely turn in the middle of the night and then want to die for few short minutes because of it causing your ligaments to pull to the brim. 

When you completely and totally forget what it's like to feel 'normal' and take nearly two baths a day to help relieve  a week long migraine and massive rib pain that just doesn't stop. 

When you notice you are starting to "nest" because you start washing your dog at the most random part of the day, or you decide to make cookies at 10 pm.

if you cant tell these photos are from my babyshower put on by my mama, mother in law, and sister in law. Love them! 

Weekend Normality

Perfection, was the best word to describe my weekend. We stayed home all weekend and did a lot of nothing. Besides eat good food and some baking. (pumpkin bars, with cream cheese frosting ladies!)  But really? I have got to tell you that I was spoiled beyond belief this weekend. We totally did a family Starbucks run in pajamas one morning (can I get an amen that its getting cooler because now things like "family Starbucks runs" exist because my husband hates coffee but loves hot chocolate...the taste buds of a child I tell you) 

Next to my spoilage- he hired a buddy of his to deep clean for us, things I haven't gotten to in awhile (umm like the entire basement) and oh joy was it heaven, he cleared out so much stuff and I know this is going to make it easier for us to move, when the time comes. Fingers crossed everyone. 

We watched a ton of football and lots of rain through the windows in our living room. The girls wrestled with Cameron allll weekend and at times it drives me seriously insane it was such a great low key weekend. While being very productive... without me doing too much. Thanks Cameron!

Tomorrow Im looking forward to a epic reunion with my best friend who has been on family vacation for 9 days. That's history for us- We plan to camp out at her home all Monday doing nothing at all, (but eat) its going to be grand. 

Money Bag Boobs

Lets start from the beginning shall we? 

I gained some weight freshly out of high school some people call it the freshman 15. Although after dropping out of the college I chose and ran anxiety attack stricken home I was no longer a freshman, I was simply a girl living with her boyfriend trying to figure out the next step. In the meantime we were (and still are) learning the way around the kitchen in a crappy small apartment and chose to eat out the majority of the time! 

Later we found out we were expecting Raygan, I was already chubby so why not add a baby! I never understood when girls would be upset about their changing body and getting big because I had never been truly comfortable in my own skin. Although the stretch marks I wasn't too pleased about. 

After having Raygan I breast fed for 9 months, lost the giant size dd boobs I've had since middle school and got to a happy size, right about that time we found out Remy was coming in strong. So clearly I didn't get too comfy in the happy size I was in. After Remy it wasn't hard to loose the weight, once again breast feeding for 9 months. I got lucky cause I only truly worked out right after Raygan and really haven't much since then. For the first time in years I was able to purchase shirts without trying them on strictly for my boobs and I was comfortable, truly comfortable in my body, even with stretch marks covering my tummy.  Ill take smaller boobs with stretch marks covering my tummy any day.

This time around its a bit more of a struggle for me mentally. I have giant money bag boobs again that I never wished upon anyone and I'm not used to it. I mean, I had to half way grasp my boobs while going down the stairs for years-a two year break and it's all new to me. 

I'm at the point in my pregnancy where my stomach doesn't smoosh, it's hard to breathe and I'm always thirsty. In hindsight I'm happy my tummy is out of the smoosh stage- it just makes maneuvering around a bit more difficult. I've forgotten what it's like to not breathe loud and to be normal-I suppose Em far from normal when you add breastfeeding into it all. But at least I know what normal is now, vs beforehand when I was still learning who I was as a person along with figuring out my own body.

I'm thankful that I have a man who likes a big booty and kindly told me-after helping me up off the couch- that he barley notices because to him he loves my body and me, and the big boobs lately are a plus for him I suppose. Even with this being my third actual pregnancy its still an odd experience and I still find the entire process overwhelming and well-totally alien-ish.

Multnomah Falls

We don't call ourselves die hards for nothing. We left a little too late and probably didn't plan as well as we should have but we had a blast and got one more thing crossed off our summer bucket list. 

If there was one photo to describe these kids...this would be the one. 

Raygan had to stop and look at the map for directions of course. 

the bridge walking into the falls

I've been dying to take my kids here. Every time we drive by the falls on our way home from a trip the girls are asleep, which means that their sleeping is too fabulous for us to stop. This place is so perfect, and beautiful. I have so many memories here with my family and I guarantee you my mama still has some of the cool trinket boxes I used to collect on our trips there. 

             

no shame.

It's been years. Since before the girls, neither have been there so obviously I thought it was the appropriate time to take them. Their easy and so fun right now. These two love the little things in life and in turn they have taught me to appreciate all things little. It's amazing actually.

The sight of the falls out them in amazement which makes this mamas heart flutter. It was overwhelming at first with the buses of tourists and hundreds of people getting off, while we were busy herding our little ones to stay together. A lot like schlepping as Kelle would say. Yep we definitely schlepped our way through this adventure. 

                 

Clearly not thrilled about posing in front of the sign.

      

            

The kids were pure perfection, the girls received their first ice cream 'cone' instead of ice cream in a bowl-holy big deal over here. We checked out the falls and snacked on some fries, then headed out for the scenic route, which in my opinion is almost better then the actual attraction itself. We let the kids play forever. Get wet? That okay we have a extra dress in the car, dirty? No big deal, we have baby wipes. Seriously it was the easiest best day ever. 

         

            

           

What we're up to lately

Lately

We are so so incredibly busy the last couple weeks, mainly on the weekends for family adventures like day trips to water parks, or weekend trips to the zoo. Then the weekdays have been full of appointments and summer fun. I'm busy cracking down on wedding stuff and planning shower details, I'm loving it and also trying not to worry to much about anything. 

Cameron's mom took the girls to a birthday party and me and cameron went and registered at bed bath and beyond, it was fun and fast! Afterward we went to dinner at a restaurant we've never been to so that's always nice. 

I took the girls to the doctor last week for shots for Remy and a check up for Raygan, she needs to have a sleep test done to help determine weather she needs to get her adenoids removed. Girlfriend snores like a 65 year old man, it's awful. We also went to her sleep conciliation that same week and it went well, it made me realize how comfortable Raygan is with her actual doctor-cause girls friend was not feeling this other doctor and I'm actually quite terrified for how the sleep test will go, wires and all crazy things hooked up to my sweet girl is going to piss her off, thankfully we can bring anything under the sun to comfort her and I want to make it seem like a fun adventure date with just mama. She loves dates. 

Cameron took the girls to our cities minor league baseball game for a date night without mama and I set out shopping for his brothers baby gift with his mom and sister, it was super fun, but I'm sad I missed the baseball game! We'll definitely go again. Hopefully.

My brother came into town which means my life has been put on hold. We've had massive family time and managed a trip to the zoo. It's been super fun having him around. 

I've somehow got tons of wedding stuff done! What did people do before Internet and iPhone, literally. I was purchasing and scheduling my booty of in the backseat of the Tahoe the entire way to Seattle, crossing one thing off my to do list at a time! (My brother got front cause his long legs-ugh) I have a dress consultation to see if there is anything the seamstress can do to help this growing belly and my dress. Wish me luck, we shall see! 

The same day my brother arrive was the same day Cameron's best friend  moved out. He's been living with us on and off for nearly five years and this last time has been since November. He's lived downstairs and I seriously can not wait to have our little family alone. It wasn't that that awful, he's like a little brother to me, but I never spoke of it simply because I hate to complain, and that would be the only thing I would have been doing. But anyways, I'm
So so happy right now:) 

Our 1970's of a rental isn't the best and keeping cool, and for our one week that didn't reach below 107 I thought I was going to die. I felt claustrophobic from the heat, like it was wrapping me up and hugging me. Then we put in a a/c in our bedroom and that helped quite a bit. Now I'm comfortable, and I doubt it will reach that high in temperature very many more times. 

I'm dying to get into a better routine around here, I feel like we've been in some sort of funk that I can't get out of. I'm thinking with Cameron's friend gone that will help out a lot:) 

A Suprise For the Girls

We surprised the girls with a trip to Seattle. My brother has been in town so he wanted to make it a priority that we took all the girls to the zoo. So we did. We soaked all of Seattle that we could within a two day period....with three kids. 

It was fabulous, and we were able to cross a couple things off our family bucket list. 

Car Shenanigans. 

After we checked into the hotel we walked down to a park a couple blocks down. It had a ton to offer, carnival rides, ice cream trucks, and a beach. The absolute best. 

 

Remy's first carnival ride ever. 

The boys went out with my brothers best friend that lives near Seattle that night, and I enjoyed a quiet night in the hotel, because three littles passed the heck out in a quickness. 

We set out the next morning to see the city and of course making a quick stop at Pikes Place Market...always.

 

Seattle always has, and will forever have my heart. I can not wait till our lives can be there. We love this city for all that it is.  I love taking my girls there because of the memories I have as a child, and the new ones that me and Cameron have created. This is our city. Our go to city.

Stealing flowers off of the pier.

The Zoo was clearly a hit, I love the aww and amazement in their eyes. Totally worth the temper tantrums and the "you will not be going to the zoo" threats that occurred prior. 

 

Raygans favorite animals of the zoo was the zebra and the elephants because the elephant played with the ball with his nose...

And Remys favorite was the monkeys and the birds. 

Remy ended up falling asleep on me, and then Raygan fell asleep on me on the way out to the car. yup glorious.