'The Boy in You'

Okay, so we  don't find out the gender of this baby for let's see-nearly more weeks. With both girls we were able to find out around 17 going on 18 weeks. So We found out about right now. Insurance is so much more strict, 20 weeks on the dot is when my appointment is scheduled. Literally on the dot. 

I'm obviously looking forward to it and dying for a little boy whereas Cameron only wants a boy 'for you' meaning me! He would be happy as a clown with one more sweet girl, and I get it! I would too if I was him, they adore him and are completely obsessed with him. Literally we'll go out to eat and it's them three in a booth sitting across from me! How sad huh! 

Everyone is just so sure that it is a little boy, clearly everyone will be happy either way but yes, every time I say I want watermelon, or jimmy johns, or right after I throw up they say 'its the boy in you' Cameron says it too and he's pretty sure he thinks it's a boy-we shall see. I don't even want to think of it too hard in fear that ill jinx it. (I'm so dumb) I think I've only had one person tell me that it's going to be a girl. One! Raygan totally swears its a boy and if
I'm believing anyone I'm believing my near 4 year old. 

We've had a boy name in mind for quite sometime, I'm pretty sure that's how I even convinced him to want a third child (half way kidding) and we love it and everyone hate hate hates it. Bwahahah. On the same thought we have a couple girls names also. 

I'm re arranging things in my mind and looking forward to getting started someday. We have a lot of changes going on around here, and I'm sure Ill put it off until after the wedding and Ill be stressing just like I did with Remy! But who Knows, I'm a hell of a lot more go with the flow these days!

Our Summer Bucket List

I love lists of all shape and forms, its the way I live my life. Paper and pen, I wish I could go all electronic and make the switch but I just cant do it. I regret it mostly when I loose my grocery list yet I have my iPhone tucked safely in my pocket. Yup that's when I realize it. 

Once again we are set out to make the most of this crazy yet memorable summer we are making our way into and I've created another list. I'm happy with it, and I may even end up adding to it. 

Feed ducks.
Go camping. Lots.
See the ocean. 

Photo shoot of the girls.
Go on a dessert date.
Be tourists in our town.
Play dress up with my girls.
Make a pie.
Go to the zoo.
Park hop.
Baseball game pro and local.
Make fresh lemonade.
Make Salsa
Picnic at the park.
Family movie outing.
Pick cherries.
Walk through a flower garden.
Go to a drive in movie.
Make Popsicles & ice cream.
Visit a water park.
Get married. 

Picnic at Multinoma falls. 

Farmers Market.
Get ice cream from Ice cream truck.

Giveaway!

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A Venue Sneak Peek

Me and my mama went to check out the venue this passed week to get some placement ideas and I had so much fun! The grounds are breathtaking and I've heard its the best in September. 

I've been placing things in my head for weeks and I'm happy we went there again. Everything about this place screams vintage and goes well with my theme. She has vintage bed frames as decorations all over the place and some pretty fabulous chandeliers in her entrance. 

Restrooms. 

Hand washing station that I'm obsessed with. 

Random flower bed.

That's all for now! 

Believe it or not this is just as much as Cameron has seen.

A Bump in my Road

I've definitely learned the meaning of bad timing throughout the last little while but this one incident in particular was awful timing. 

the most inconvenient spot ever. 

I woke  up and feeling off, kinda sick feeling with a headache. I halfway slept on the couch with Raygan as we watched cartoons and waited for the others to wake up. I mustered up some energy to take the girls to the splash park because my niece is in town and we had to show her a good time of course. 

We lasted a couple hours and headed home, as soon as we got home I felt some massive pain in my lower left side of my stomach. I handled the pain for a little while then text Cameron and told him "I hate to complain but...." I'm not a complainer, I just try and handle it. I hold stuff in. So whenever I've had to go to the er he knows it's bad. (Which has seemed like a ton the last couple years) he came home and my best friend came to pick me up. My original plan was to drive but Cameron put a stop to that (thank god)

I have never witness pain like that. Child labor was far less. I have never begged for medication like I did, and I have never sent my friend for a doctor two different times in five minutes.

So many hours later their result was I had a massive UTI. I'm still not fully sure that's what's going on because I've had many in my life and I don't even feel like it. This is the same er that sent me home twice two years ago because they couldn't figure out what was causing my continuous fainting and high temperature, oh and the vomiting, in result it ended up being a miscarriage that was having trouble passing. And again the same er that told me that i "wasn't in pain" enough when I went there for my appendix and what do you know -test and blood levels proved I needed an appendectomy. 

So we shall see.

Randomosity

I really have no direction for this post other then just a bunch of this and that! 

So shall we.

It's been so gloomy here the last couple days and I don't hate it that's for sure. I wish we could skip summer and go right to the fall, but then I would skip my wedding and have a baby. hmmm maybe not? I'm usually one to l.o.v.e summer but this year-I'm just not feelin' it.

 We took my niece home after nearly a week and boy are we starting to have with drawls. 

I fell in love with Cameron all over again when he called simply to tell me that the Heat won the NBA finals. swoon. We text all throughout (literally) the day and usually only call for something big or when we need to tell each other something fast. I obviously was so excited that the Heat won-with us being Heat fans and all.

It's 1030 and these girls are crackkkkin. Then slept the way to meet my nieces mom and that was at 7, which calls for a late night. Woohoooo!

I finally got Lamp shades for our room. They've been shade less for months months, and it's a bonus they were on clearance at target. I also got a killer cut from changing out the picture frames above our bed, (finally getting a color scheme going on as well with the thanks to this chair.) seriously that glass was so sharp, The cut's a good one. 

Is anyone else disappointed with Kim & Kanyes baby name? Really-north west? I was ready for something fabulous, that is just not what I was expecting, maybe it will grown on me.

Raygans birthday is a couple weeks prior to the wedding (why oh why didn't I realize that) so that means I've already paid for and reserved the gazebo in the park (splash park) and I've already ordered her birthday invitations. Am I crazy? Ill be damned if my girls party is lacking because of this wedding. So I'm trying to nip it in the bud. Luckily my girl is like her mama and once her mind is made-it's made. She's had her heart set on a little mermaid party-at the splash park-with all her 'families' and friends- with hot dogs and hamburgers, and fruit. Her words exactly. Oh and sparkly cupcakes.  Consider it done babe. I'm confident she'll hang on to that exact description until halfway through August. Either way I'm so so excited! 

That One Time my House Caught on Fire

Nearly a year ago (already?) my brother was staying with us freshly after he graduated college and thank goodness for that because not only did he help around our house i.e build us a fence and clean out our entire garage he saved our house from burning down.

our 1970's rental 

My parents have been telling us for years to get renters insurance because "stuff happens" Every time I thought about it I  would talk myself out of it because we are not counting on living here for much longer-we say that, then another year goes by. It's so easy I'm not sure why I never did anything about it.

All of a sudden we all started smelling a burnt-fiery smell. For a split second we thought it was outside because we live in a dessert and fires run high throughout June and July because the wind is intense as well. Great combination. We searched the rooms-nothing. Appliances-nothing. Garage-nothing. My genius brother thought maybe he should check under the house because the smell seemed to be in our downstairs family room. Thankfully he did because that is something Cameron would never do. (that was one thing holding him back from becoming an electrician, going under houses due to his fear of spiders)

After my hero of a brother crawled down into our crawl space he yelled for water and next thing I knew he was out of there and grabbing his tools. He told us it was a fire underneath because of a screen rubbing against another type of metal (don't ask questions because I don't get it, I was just happy he fixed it.) He said it was about a foot wide and tall. That is enough for me to freak out right there because if my brother was not living with us I'm certain our house would be gone along with everything in it, even though we are living in a rental we cherish this home along with our beloved belongings. 

After that event I have looked around at many types of insurances but have never followed through. Can you say stupid? I've put it on my "to do" list and I'm determined to cross it off. If you are in the market for insurance I hope you check out Polygon. They offer services for water damage, leak detection, fire damage as well as humidity control. They are also available in countries other then the United States.

Battle Picking

After nearly four years of being a mom (gasp!) I've learned to pick my battles. I just don't see the point in arguing with two very opinionated, and extremely fashion forward little minds. 

They've argued with me about sleeping with their shoes on, in which I just take them off when they are sleeping so what's the big deal? It's been awhile since they tried to leave in a princess ensemble but they tried to last night on our way out the door for dinner, Cameron apparently has learned the same thing as I have and responded with 'sure why not.'

I rolled my eyes and got their shoes on, who really cares. We sure didn't, and we made two little girls very happy, and I'm pretty sure that's why they behaved so well, because you can't act naughty in a princess dress silly! 

Mostly the girls got a nice response, many people stopped to tell them how pretty they looked and the both said thank you accordingly. However we also got a couple who the hell lets their kid go to dinner like that, and I'm proudly saying that we did, they are only little once and if they want to wear a Disney gown they will rock it.-just like they did!

Wordless Wednesday:A Swim Day

Crunch Time

I guess it's so called crunch time for our wedding. 

I'm probably the most laid back bride to be ever. I mean I know how I want things and that's pretty much how they'll go...but seriously if something doesn't get done big woop. I'm just looking forward to the day. I'm thankful for my family that is letting me use some much stuff and helping me out major...now if only my brother was living in a state near me my life would be complete. I need him. Hes my DIY bandit and my party guru. I've literally been sending him photos via text message saying how do I get a little rust of this...or what should I do?

Well September is getting close and actually I feel like I have quite a bit done. With a couple bumps in the road.

-------------

.two days ago the wedding photographer I've had since before I was ever engaged backed out. He's a so called family friend that now sucks. Anywho, I have found and happily happily booked this photographer quick as can be. He surprisingly had our wedding date free and I lucked out big time.

.my nanny (grandma) has a ton of property filled with a bunch of antiques just chillen, claw foot tubs and all. I can't wait to dig through there after seeing all the photos my dad sent me. Woohoo! Me and my dad went antiquing this week and it was so much fun! Not only did we score on some vintage keys, and suitcases we had a blast together! 

.the cake has been a done deal for some time, and I have the flower appointment next week! Some simple white center prices and my Bouquet so I'm excited to check that off the list. 

.songs songs. Songs. This is going to killll me.

.diys-I have a great bf that basically made the first DIY project so far. OMG she's amazing! They are for the side of the road so people are prepared to stop and don't miss the place:) seriously so excited!

.favors! I can't decide on potted succulents or these flower bombs similar to this just packaged differently and probably more brown then white based on some directions I read. What do you guys think? Really!! Help!

{source}

.tables & chairs come with the venue so  that's nice, they are round tables with white chairs. I damn near have everything for the centerpieces which include, vintage books, lace, keys, and a jar of some type. I'm planning on throwing a little something together this week and if all turns out well like it does in my head, I shall share with you all.

I've Come to Realize (link up)

I've come to realize

...that painting your toes a light purple instantly makes you happy. 

...that timing ultimately sucks. 

...that diet Pepsi makes my world go 'round.

...that I really want to find cooking classes.

...that I simply can not get enough watermelon or Jimmy Johns

...that the basketball finals take way to long. 

...that it is most certainly crunch time for the wedding. 

omg

...that I still very much want to do something with myself & this time that I don't have. Perhaps after the wedding?

linking up here and you should too :)

Reflecting

I remember having a conversation with my brother, I was a sophomore in high school and recently broke up with my then boyfriend-I clearly thought the world was ending, like any dramatic high school girl would. I'm not sure if he asked me where I see my life going or if I  just went out and  said it-which is something I totally would do. One way or another I confessed to him that I saw myself successful in the corporate world, living in a big city in a penthouse with only a giant dog while being consumed in my work. I even elaborated on my dog, I told him that he (it was a he) would hate every man that stepped foot in my penthouse but he would love 'the one' the second he stepped in, but I went on to how that would never happen because I would be consumed in my work. He looked at me, collected his thoughts and said 'that's sad sis'  two seconds later we were both laughing. 

Fast forward 8 years and Im chatting along with my gals in the car about what they want to be when they grow up-Raygan (for that split second) wanted to fix cars, and Remy shes been stuck on being a mermaid for awhile now. (dream big girls) Raygan went on about how my job is to go to the store when we need food, and to cook dinner and clean. 

DING DING DING. 

Although her description doesn't sound that glamorous I do love it. I hate missing their moments and live to make each day special.  

I always said I wanted to be married by 22, have babies by 24, but never thought it would actually happen.  Things happened a tiny bit earlier and definitely backwards but hey?  Never once did I see myself as a 'housewife' and honestly didn't really like kids. I swore while I was pregnant with Raygan that I would work 6 weeks after she was born. Bologna! She came and I was smitten with her, obsessed if you will. I hated leaving her and never mentioned going to work or starting a career as a massage therapist. (She didn't make it easy leaving her either-the little screamer) I waited around to see if Cameron would say anything, the subject never truly came up. So I went with it. My intentions were there, but my heart was not. For awhile I tip-toed around the job subject hoping he would still say 'oh you'll start working someday' 

I was a stay at home mama I never thought I'd be and I'm still soaking it in nearly four years later. 

The Blogging World.



The world of blogging is such a fun, weird, crazy community isn't it? As 'bloggers' (yup still odd to me) we feel the need to share
with other bloggers which in most cases are people we've never met and probably chances are we most likely wont. We pore our hearts out on our blogs and update them before we even get the chance to fill in our best real life friend on the dramatic happenings of our daily lives.

But yet none of you know me for real real. Its so weird what I write on here vs. what real life friends know about me. I mean... I'm the same, I act the same? 

If you knew me for real you would know that I talk to much and my speed doubles when I'm nervous or uncomfortable and that I share way to much. You would know that I have a little 'finger dance' that my niece caught up on by the age of two as "aunt ash's" dance. Its something I do when I get excited, and lets face it-that's a lot. 

With that being said, I still feel like this blog 'knows' me better then my best friend even if she's known of my 'finger dance' for years. Of course I send a text like "oh my gosh Remy just went bat shit crazy for ballet pictures" to my said bestie because obviously who wouldn't want to know about a two year old screaming her brains out over an outfit that she didn't like for photos. But they don't know what I did for my entire weekend, or what my brain thinks about. 

When I first started blogging I struggled with being "me" and being personable, well I've grown with this blog quite a bit and I feel like its totally mine. My space. Its a completely different world and people that are not into blogging think its totally weird, and I mean it is right? Why do people even care what I write about or what I did this week? Its odd, but yet I totally do care about other blogs out there and I think about my 'online friends' randomly throughout the day. I look forward to posts and seeing pictures of their kids birthday parties. 


Its weird. The whole thing is quite weird, but I do love it. 

Outfit Wearing, and a Outing

Raygan:

Dress: Target Cherokee (last year)

shoes: Zulilly

Remy: Dress Tj Maxx

Shoes: Old Navy

Hat: Target 

We ventured to the Farmers market this week on opening day, and boy was it crackin! The girls had a blast people watching and snacking on some fresh food!

Cherry Eating

Feet Dippin

And Listening to a string band.

Hot dog eating.

Linking up with this lovely and this one too!

Code Yellow

Target employees: code yellow. 

If you've ever had to hear those words I feel so bad for you. It was awful, the worst moment in the history of me

Being a mom. 

I was on the hunt for some maternity pants, most if my pants still fit me but I'm running out of options. While I was at it I browsed the rest of Target of course. 

I let her get out of the cart because she was restless and honestly? Gf was helping me pick out clothes. Literally they both genuinely pick out clothes. They've done that forever, I tried jeans on in the dressing room and they rocked it, agreed with my choices too! 

Before the madness.

Then within five seconds Remy took off. Raygan and I chasing her, she's a fast little shit. She got to the Tony Hawk section of little boy clothes and was gone. Gone. Gone. I was sick. I flagged down the nearest Target employee and he announced a code yellow on the walkie talkie. They quickly responded-description? What the hell was she wearing. I asked raygan is complete panic what is your sister wearing? She replied with a dress she was wearing earlier that day (I can't blame her because they both go through clothes allll day) oh yeah! Grey shirt and leggins! 

He said it on the talkie and within seconds someone said they had her in lingerie. Raygan and I ran over to her and saw her standing with two bright red shirt people like everything was normal and she knew them, looking up at them throughout their convo. 

She ran to me the second she heard us with a giant (thankful) smile on her face I hugged her and debated what to do next. Honestly? I wanted to spank that butt like I never had before. Her smile quickly changed and she grew fidgety and nervous running her tongue over her teeth. I chatted with her and she clung to me like she never had before. I thanked the Target people a million times and the lady told me, hey it happens more then you think, and really the best place to loose a kid is target-you can't escape us target people. 

I walked away sweating and shaking, holding one child clinging to my neck, and hands clinched with my oldest child that was still overcoming the giant scare. I broke down balling of course. I just lost my kid. Who does that. I've never in my life been so sick to my stomach in my life. It happened so fast, and I must say the Target people were on it! Like fast, I'm pretty sure the entire thing happened in 4 minutes judging by my text conversation! 

Poor raygan was terrified repeating I'm worried about Remy mom! And then later wouldn't stop talking about it telling us how scared she was for her sister. 

Remy hated talking about it and the second you brought it up she became shy and all lovey. She got a giant talk from dad and it's came up often since then. I'm pretty sure that scared her shitless because she has not tried to get out of the cart once in all of our endeavors since then

Fridays Letters

Dear Raygan: My mini me-I cant tell you how many times I heard that this week. And you are, in every single way. You are getting to be such a big girl, every single time I look at you its in complete awe. However that being said-you are still not allowed to walk home from the park. Not for a very long time. Not ever. I don't care what the "other kids" are doing. I'm so proud of the little girl you are becoming and I love being with you, you are so fun, and I love our singing sessions in the car, you totally rock. 

Dear Remy: You are giving me a run for my money this week. You added a tiny bit more crazy into your peppy little self and its damn near making me crazy. I find you naked on the counter with two plates (one for sissy of course) with cereal on both, and the next day I walk into the bathroom with an entire forehead of mascara. And then the next day after that you literally created a "Code Yellow" at target. Lets see what you'll get yourself into this week. Regardless I love your quirkiness with all that its worth. 

(if any of you know what that means, I'm sorry, and Ill get into that a separate post.)

Dear Friends: Thank you for your sweet words over and over again! 

Dear Summer: I still don't know if I'm ready for you, although our recent swim in the pool and the trip to the farmers market was quite fun!

Dear Cameron: Take a breather, this quarter is almost over and then you can relax a tad. I hope next is a little less stressful for you, and once again I'm so proud of you.

Some Deets

Yep.

16weeks. 

I never thought it would be hard to keep this little secret away from my little blog. But it's been soooo hard. So unbelievably hard. I thought I'd be able to carry on with my random posts like normal but it's been so hard to not say, we're expecting baby number 3. It's been even more hard in real life. Until I told my mom I avoided calling her every am (like I always do) and every time I would see my sister in law or mother in law I couldn't look them in the eye. It was awful, I would  talk less and my mother in law even called Cameron to see why I was "sad." I'm not sad!! I just had news and I'm Terrible at hiding things. 

We've always waited awhile to tell people. With Raygan is was more the fact that I was apprehensive because we were young, Remy We didn't find out ourselves until I was nearly 3.5 months because I continued having my period and nothing was very different...until I fainted. With this sweet baby, Cameron had wanted to try and wait until his sister had her baby...we didn't want to rain on anyone's parade. But we (or should I say Raygan) ended up spilling the beans at our Mothers Day Brunch. Which was a good thing because my belly was already protruding and I don't know how much longer it'd last.


Now I can share little things I've been wanting to badly to share. Things like...
-we had to stop three times in the beautiful redwoods so I could throw up. 

-These girls are already obsessed with the fact that they will get a 'little brother' I remind them that we don't know yet, and Raygan replies "I hope so, real bad, we already have girls."

-We've been to one social gathering since finding out in which Cameron told me "you can go grab a beer" three times and I only replied by pointing at my stomach. silly boy.

-I want watermelon like no body's business, while I'm the only one in the house that eats it that's totally okay because Ill eat the whole thing.

-I'm finally not dozing off mid way through the day, and our house isn't totally a disaster zone, oh! And I actually don't mind cooking again. Thank you Cameron for putting up with me!

-The fact that I will be nearly 7 months on my wedding day. We are a far stretch from traditional that's for sure. 



This year is going to trump the rest. Our wedding is in September and this baby is due in November, right after thanksgiving and right before Christmas.

We are so unbelievably excited and we're obviously eager to see if this little baby is a boy or girl.

I never though Id find cute Maternity pants.

Me

Shirt//Tj maxx.

Capri's//Target Maternity.

Glasses//firmoo

Raygan

Dress//Target

Remy

Romper//Target hand me down from big sister

linking up here and here and here

These Faces.

These faces make my world go 'round.

Thank you all for your sweet words regarding baby number 3.

We are so excited and I cant wait to share more:)